B asked this morning if he could start calling me his 'fiance', since calling me his girlfriend seems kinda lame now that we live together. Which just points to the need for something to call your cohabiting partner other than 'cohabiting partner' which is a totally lame title.
Does this mean we should change our facebook to "engaged?" Ha. I don't know why I'm being so iffy about all this. I mean, we do have semi-concrete plans to get married. Well not concrete in the way of actual wedding plans (cause we're not going to have a big wedding), but concrete in the way of we know approximately when we're planning on getting married at city hall.
Oh wait, I do know why I'm being iffy...cause I have family who is probably going to get all up in my business the moment we officially announce any kind of engagement. Especially on facebook...I have like 10 or so first and second cousins on facebook, and the second I change anything there they'll be calling my parents asking why they weren't invited to the engagement party. And then my parents will have to explain that since B is not a Jew they hate him despite never having met him, and are not endorsing our marriage in any way. And then I'm going to have random relatives calling me and trying to discourage me from marrying him. Wouldn't it just be easier to tell them after the fact? My friend didn't tell her family that she was married until a few months after she and her husband got married...I totally dig that model.
But then again, on the other hand, what the fuck family. I'm happy and proud that I'm with B, so why all the secrecy? Oh right, lack of unconditional love. Sigh.
So I guess me and B are pretty much engaged now? I don't have a ring or anything, and I don't want one. Having gone through all those shenanigans last time I was engaged, I'm thoroughly disillusioned with the whole engagement/wedding thing. Besides, I've always been the type to hate doing things the traditional way.
In other news, my dad sent me an email on Friday talking about regular bullshit stuff, and then was like "P.S. i got the results of my genetic tests, maybe we can meet for lunch in [my city] next Friday to discuss them". The genetic tests in question being the test for a BRCA2 mutation that his sister has tested positive for. The BRCA2 mutation being something that causes an increased risk of breast and ovarian cancer, that is a common mutation among Ashkenazi Jews. Did I mention my grandmother and her two sisters all had breast cancer, and that her 2 sisters died of breast cancer, and she died of ovarian cancer? And my aunt with the mutation also has breast cancer? I'm assuming since my dad is suggesting we talk about it in person after not visiting me for 3 years, this means he has the mutation as well.
After freaking out about this for like an hour, I realized that this doesn't really change anything in my life...I was already going to go for early mammograms cause of my family history, and I always get a yearly check up at the gyno. If my dad has this mutation I have a 50% chance of having it. If I have the mutation that means my chance of getting breast cancer by age 70 is about 86%. So yeah, I'm probably going to get breast cancer at some point, yay. The good news is that with the BRCA2 mutation (unlike the BRCA1 mutation) people usually get breast cancer a little later in life (like in your 50s and 60s), so by then hopefully they'll have cured cancer. :) The weird news is that I can't get tested at this point, until they pass that genetic discrimination bill, because if I do, future health insurance companies might refuse to cover me. Even after they pass it, health insurance can still charge my employers higher premiums for health insurance, so I probably won't get tested until after I actually have a job. But in more good news, that genetic testing discrimination bill just got passed in the senate and is up for a vote in the house this week. And Bush supports it.
So now my dad is visiting me for lunch on Friday? I don't have to worry about him finding out about B living with me accidentally, since we'll probably just meet up by my office. But maybe I should tell him me and B are planning on moving in together? (notice I like to say "planning" and not "already have" as I feel telling him that would be a mistake at this point). Or that we are planning on getting married? Maybe I should ask again if he wants to meet B? Although I think B can't get out of work until at least 2 on Friday...