I've mentioned before how my parent's are totally in denial about me being an atheist/not religious, and will constantly ask me what I'm doing for holidays.
Well in yesterday's conversation that awkward moment happened again! My mom asked what seder I was going to, as if she assumes I will be going to a seder. I vaguely answered something about being invited to a few seders (true) but haven't made specific plans (also true). Of course this is a lie by misdirection- the reason I have no specific plans is that I have no intention on going to any seder (although a friend is having a seder for family and friends that I would love to go to, if he didn't live 3 states away). Actually, a few days back my office mate practically begged me to go to a grad student seder with her so that she wouldn't have to go alone, and I turned her down. I just can't stand those awkward social gatherings full of desperate single people who are only at this community seder becuase they are looking to meet their future spouse.
My mom then started going on about how she knows someone from my school who is driving up to her town before pesach, and that I could get a ride with him, etc, and I had to come up with something about how busy I am at work (also true). But seriously mom. Seriously. Why must we play this game of lies? I don't want to hurt her feelings by flat out saying I'm not going to any seder, but I feel like I'm totally leading her on here. Is it better to flat out tell her the truth so she stops asking, and gives up hope, or to just lead her on so that she doesn't feel bad, but keeps asking these questions for which I have no good answer?
It's the same dilemna over and over again. I feel like our roles are reversed now..when I was a kid she was protecting me from the 'evils' of the world, but now that I'm an adult, I'm protecting her from the knowledge of how things really are. I'm like that Mom who keeps saying "Daddy is on vacation" when really he just left and doesn't want to see his kids, or died or something.