Tomorrow morning I find out about whether or not I have that genetic mutation that will pretty much assure I get cancer of some kind. Ok, not 100%, but with a 80% chance of breast cancer and a 45% chance of ovarian cancer (and an elevated chance of colon and pancreatic cancer), I'd probably get one of them. In case you're new here- my dad has this genetic mutation (BRCA1 mutation) and I have a 50% chance of having it too. I got tested about 6 weeks ago and find out the results tomorrow.
Meanwhile I have a moral dilemma. See, when I got tested, my dad (who insisted I get tested) told me he would pay for the gentic testing, which costs around $550 total. He immediately paid the $150 I had to pay a genetic counselor, and I put the rest on my health insurance.
Two days ago I got a notification from my health insurance saying that I would be responsible for up to $285 of the cost of the testing.
Now, on the one hand...My dad told me he would pay for this testing, and I underwent the testing under the assumption that he would pay for it.
On the other hand, My dad told me he would pay for this testing when I got the test, but between then and now (when I find out the results) I also got engaged. I haven't talked to my dad since I sent him that email about coming to my wedding. Or my mom. And I kinda would like to keep it that way. I've decided at this point that if they want a relationship with me, the ball is in their court re: contacting me. And they haven't.
On the other hand, since my dad paid that initial $150, arn't I ethically responsible to report to him the results of my genetic testing? I can just ask him for money when telling him the results.
On the other hand, my health is my own business, not his, I hate asking my dad for money (that $150 was the first time I asked for money since I left for graduate school almost four years ago), and I don't want to ask him for more money.
On the other hand, $285 is a LOT of money, especially when I don't have income this summer. That's like half my share of the rent. And if I have the genetic mutation, there's a whole bunch of co-pay's in my future for a yearly Breast MRI and yearly Mammogram. And inevitably ovary-removal surgery. And you know...treating cancer when I get it and stuff.
On the other hand, I spent almost that much money last weekend at the ASAs, and isn't my health more important than my career? I can afford it, but it would be money I could have spent on my wedding, on put in my savings to buy a house, or on mental-health related vacations. Or on stuff like rent and food. Since I"m pretty much living off of savings until the end of September.
So it seems I have arrived at this compromise in my head. If I don't have the genetic mutation, I will happily eat the cost of testing, and maybe send my dad a text message saying I don't have it. If I do have the genetic mutation, I will suck up my pride and ask for the money, cause it's going to be a long expensive journey afterwards. But maybe still text message him, cause I'm not quite at the point where I want to talk to him on the phone.
Although it's always possible I will change my mind when it comes to actually text messaging him, and decide $285 is worth it not to contact him.