Friday, May 2, 2008

waiting for my dad to get here

I'm in my office today even though I really have no work-related reason to be (just grading papers today, which I can do from home), cause I'd rather meet up with my dad here than at my apartment, where he might accidentally find out B lives with me (B is at work at the moment so they wouldn't run into each other, but there's all his stuff in our apartment. And his kitty).

I just remembered: the last time my dad visited, I was all worried about wearing pants in front of him. I finally did go with the pants, because I decided that since he was visiting me at my home, I should be able to wear what I normally wear and not have to dress up for him. But it was a big deal.

That was almost 4 years ago. This morning I put on some jeans and a very-short sleeve shirt without even thinking about it, even though the fact that my dad was visiting today was heavy on my mind. Now the thought of wearing a skirt or longer sleeves so my dad wouldn't somehow find out how not religous I am is completely alien to me; of course I'm going to wear pants.

I still don't know if I'm going to tell him about B living with me/being engaged or not. I do want to mention something about how I no longer feel comfortable talking to my parents in any more personal way than I would talk to my adviser or boss. In fact, even my adviser knows that B moved in, cause I was stressing out to her about how he was moving in just when I had to finish the first draft of my dissertation proposal (which I handed in a few days ago, yay!)

I'll play it by ear I guess. But if any time is the time, this is the time; even if he storms off in a fit and abandons me at the somewhat-far kosher resturaunt we are going to for lunch, I can always call up B to come pick me up. Much better than telling him on a visit to my parent's house, where I have no clear escape plan. Plus I don't really want to visit my parent's house ever again. I end up being depressed and stressed out on every visit I make.

oops that's the phone... he's here, gotta go. More updates later for sure.

3 comments:

  1. This drama is way more interesting than the dreck on TV. Can't wait to hear how it went!

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  2. Such drama people don't need. If your parents didn't care about you I doubt they would get all stressed out about what you do. In life you can either find things out the easy way or hard way.

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  3. Good luck AE. I hope your Dad is in an understanding mood.

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